SHHH

We like beer as much as the next guy, but...

Spring has finally arrived to Korea - from Run 1670 Trail

Hare Ammo

Tunnel Falsie - Bi-directional Views

Last Week’s Notes:

Run 1670 marked the first truly beautiful spring run of the season – and what better place than Hong Eun-je 2-dong?  True the name of the place rolls off of the tongue like the phlegm of an old man in heat, but that’s what it’s all about, isn’t it?  The contradictions of purpose and motivation are what epitomizes the Seoul Hash!

Joining us in this escapade of spring were Twin Cheeks, EM ShiTonya, Marvel, LeperCon and eventually Jolly Green Knob who brought out with him visiting Iboibo.  At the last minute, long-lost OB1 appeared.  The GM made a brief appearance to drop of the beer since the Hash Hooch was caught up with family obligations. 

Hare Ammo took control of the pan and called out for the Wingee, Fukaduk, who was not present, so called upon Marvel to be the Stand-in Wingee for a splashing.  Following that, he could have literally blown his own horn but neglected to bring it out with him.  Regardless, he then splashed himself as the run’s Hare.  He said there would be markings in chalk and shredded secrets.  He said that the trail would feature several checks and each of the false directions would be marked with the double bars of a falsie (lying bastard that he is…).  He said there were would be two “A/B” splits.  He was coached that the term is “A/D.”  He insisted in using the term “A/B” – and who were we to argue; he held the pan. Finally he pointed with his elbow in the directions of condos to the north and we were off.

The Trail

The pack scrambled out past the tennis courts and up the hillside spotting the first trail marking.  OB1, Jolly Green and Iboibo taking the lead with Twin Cheeks and LeperCon further back with EM ShiTonya and Marvel taking on the rear guard responsibilities.  It was then a mad scramble along an upward trail and into the trees passing Korean families decked out in varying degrees of hiking paraphernalia (some of them obviously taking hai-kingu more seriously than the pack).

It was up to a small shoulder to our first check and then down again and around the rump of the mountain.  It was another up to another clearing affording a fine view and then along a ridge line to another saddle.  Here the check got pretty messed up for a variety of reasons but it did momentarily bunch the pack together.  After some confusion and prolonged, pointless runs into falsies, the True Trail was discovered plunging down and along a wild flower lined trail that eventually took the Pack past a spring and OnOn to a falsie.  It was then back to the spring and yet further down a steep bit of trail and out on to a major expressway at the mouth of Bugak Tunnel.  Here a check was found, annotated by some Korean who added smiling eyes and mouth to the circle (“Have a Good Day!!”).  The tunnel to the left was a wrong turn but the trail resumed to the right along a good stretch of sidewalk.

It was then across the expressway at a stoplight and around a park on the other side.  Ignoring another check and taking the certain steep trail up past a hamlet, the trail circled around a temple and offered the first “A/B” split. The B, er, D trail went up and over a hill and presumably straight back to the OnIn.  The D trail took a right and followed the contour before eventually climbing to the ridgeline that ascended to the summit of the terrain.  The Trail was well marked here but then the pack encountered all sorts of fun and games with the last major check.  Some found the True Trail and at least LeperCon said, “screw it” and found their own ways down from the summit.

At the edge of a dirt athletic field, Ammo had arranged a fine selection of cold cuts, breads, etc. along with soft drinks and BEER.

The Circle

Still holding the pan, Ammo called upon EM ShiTonya to snort the Organic Horn and to lead us in the Hash Benediction.  Following that he splashed himself again followed by telling a blonde joke.  He then declared that Iboibo as the asshole who preceded all other assholes and promptly splashed him as the run’s Wingee.

With that Great Pretender (GP) Ammo moved on to the Categories.  This time we had an Actual (as opposed to Virtual) OB1, our Hash Cash, to advise the GP on the current results.

First of all we had a Newly Paid-up Hasher, for one year no less, EM ShiTonya!  The EM read out the amazing similarities between Presidents Lincoln and Kennedy.  He also gave a report on Worm and Rover attempting to motor down to check out the cheery bosoms but gave upon reaching the highway toll gate at 12:30 noon.  He also noted that things were not looking good elsewhere.  The French Open had been cancelled; plenty enough rackets but a shortage of balls.

Also Newly Paid-up was Jolly Green Knob who evoked our tears of sentimentality as he crooned, “Whip It Out at the Ball Game.”

Marvel may (or may not) have paid up but he was brought up to tell a joke about a Hasher and a traffic cop – always an intriguing combination.

OB1 qualified for two categories:  Newly Paid-up and Returnee Hasher.  He explained that he had been in Malaysia and told us a joke. 

Ammo EM ShiTonya & Twin Cheeks

Visiting Hasher Iboibo's mug

Iboibo's other mug

Paid-Up Guest was Iboibo, a Yank from Montreal, Canada.  He correctly answered the question that it was Jolly Green Knob who brought him out.  Iboibo told us his only North Korean joke.  A veteran Hasher, he had a fine repertoire of nasty jokes and fit in well with the Circle. 

LeperCon was called up and offered long-sleeve St Paddy’s Day Seoul t-shirts to each of the attending Hashers as penance for screwing off as Hon Sec during the two runs prior and during the Irish Festival.  He then read some notable quotes about the Frogs by famous people.

Marvel was then brought back to the front and asked about where he felt like going this time of the evening.  To the amusement of the neighborhood kids who had been peering in from the other side of the cyclone fence, our bunch of grown men starting dancing about with obscene gestures to the tune of the Seoul Hash Hymn.

It was then OnOn to the various Hash bars with final destination at the MMT.