SHHH

Another example of Shock & Awe:

Run 1669 Patch

Co-Hare Capt Marvel

PCH Memorial in the background

Marvel setting the Trail

More than simply a phone - a joke library!

Last Week’s Notes:

It was one of those Korean spring days - a magnificently clear, even warm morning followed by an overcast and cool afternoon.  But no matter.  Co-hares Capt. Marvel and LeperCon took advantage of the better weather to set a trail with many checks and falsies to give the feeling of a long run in yet a remarkably small geographical area near the Chahamun district in northern Seoul.  

Arriving for the run were Ammo, JockStrap, EM ShiTonya, Jolly Green Knob, Rover, Fukaduk and BaliHite - the latter arriving a bit late with the beer due to traffic conditions complete with an accident that snarled up traffic.

Hash Horn Ammo called the circle to discover that  three-time Wingee Nightcrawler had skipped - undoubtedly to avoid a triple splashing - which would have been no problem since the beer was still in stuck in traffic with the Hash Hooch.  Hence no splash beer, no Wingee and not even a stand-in Wingee.  So we were left with simply virtual splashing of the co-hares who warned of a trail largely marked in chalk with shredded secrets making up most of the checks.  Also, there was no A/D split since the hares wanted everyone to enjoy the entire, exceptionally beautiful experience.  Speaking of which, the hares pointed to the OnOut that took the pack immediately down hill, past an open-door outhouse and an amazing, large collection of consumed soju bottles.

The Trail

The trail continued steeply down and out into a residential district of small twisting alleys where the pack encountered its first check.  This one caused the most difficulties since there were falsies leading off of falsies.  But in five minutes meandering the True Trail was discovered taking the pack into a dirt parking lot and up into wooded hills.  Following a ridge line and another check, the trail took the pack down to the right along a lower, perpendicular ridge and ultimately deposited them at a check across a stream from a temple.  Ignoring the trail leading along the stream but choosing wisely to cross the water, the pack followed to yes, another check.  

For once True Trail did not lead up on to the opposite ridge but down and round the base of the hill, through more horrible architecture of "villa" apartments and out to the back of an early '60's monument of early Park Chung Hee public housing. Guessing the true trail upon passing one more check, the trail went up and down (on the same side of the street) a pedestrian overpass stairway, along the street and around the aforementioned PCH public monument.

Behind the apartment complex the trail led back up into the hills.  Crossing several checks - including two within 20 meters of each other, the True Trail followed a major hill's ridgeline.  From this viewpoint EM ShiTonya, Rover and Jockstrap watched the more ardent hounds run snapping pictures, and giving color commentary of the others' progress.

Ready to Run: Jolly, Ammo & Rover

Special Visual Treat along True Trail

Fukaduk OnIn!

Jockstrap, Rover and EM ShiTony OnIn

The trail then took those hounds who were actually following the trail off the hill to the left and out to an open space marked by a fenced off ancient pine, once the favored Circle location of years gone past of Reindeer.  But no lingering for sentimentalism but OnOn to the other end of the clearing to a rock marked with a question mark and two arrows going in opposite direction.  Both worked but one trail was marked with a falsie parallel bars.  

It was then out through some houses and up stone steps crossing stone terraces.  From there it was a jaunt along the terraces to yet another temple and down along an asphalt street before taking a left up an alley.  From there it was a turn into a yet smaller alley leading up past a truck garden and on to the wooded ridge.  

From there the hounds had to decipher a check.  True Trail was found on the other side of a tree that had recently been blown down across the trail.  Climbing over the tree it was largely down hill, past the foundations and dry pond of a Yi-Chosun era pavilion.  The trail took the runners up along a picturesque (really!) brook and into a small patch of farm land.  From there it was pretty much road work up a hill, past ROK sentries before descending down stone steps some 20 meters to the OnIn chalk marking.  From there it was 250 meters back up the hill to the Circle site.

The hounds were rewarded with make-yourself deli sandwiches, soft drinks and BEER.

The Circle

The GM was unable to show due to military duty obligations.  Ammo after thanking the hares departed for another commitment.  Looking around, it was agreed that our Hash Haberdasher Jolly Green Knob would serve at the Great Pretender (GP).  Of special note, the GP had a choice of splash beer - Cass or Mickey's Big Mouth.  For once, Cass was considered the premium beer and the splashees were treated to high octane Mickey's.

The GP called for a circle but since the Hash Horn had departed, it was up to the versitile EM ShiTonya to provide an Organic Hash Horn blast with a Kleenix which up calling us all he skillfully backward bounced the tissue off the ground and on to the fire.

The co-hares were called to the front to receive accounts of the trail.  Comments included that the first check was too confusing but things worked out once the Pack found the trail by noticing they were running in the opposite direction of the arrows for a short piece.  Rover gave it a rating of "best trail all day" since he had run also in the morning with Fukaduk in the Yongsan Hash that had offered an unexceptional trail.

The GP then splashed the hares and forgot(?) to ask LeperCon for a story or whatever but remembered to ask Capt Marvel for something.  Marvel read a Homeland Security bulletin calling for the public at a designated time for the women to run around their blocks naked with the men to sit out on chaise lounges drinking beers to weed out suspected Islamic terrorists.  Afterwards Capt Marvel distributed the above-depicted Run 1669 Patches.

When called on to name the asshole who preceded all other assholes, the hares allowed that Ammo had come in first with a very good time of 48 minutes followed by a Fukaduk about two minutes later.  Since only FADuk remained, he was splashed as the run's Wingee.  Being the good engineer that he is, he told a joke that had been stored on his multipurpose cell phone.

Again since Hash Cash OB1 was absent, the GP turned to the Virtual OB1 and drew up non-responses to all queries regarding the Categories.  

Hash Flash Rover reported messages from You What? as to where to send the Royal Southside Hash's 1500 Run packages to the Seoul Hashers who had canceled at the last minute. 

Jockstrap was called up where he told a true story of Farty Breath reaming out the country managing director of Cathay Pacific for poor handling of frequent flyers at a recent soiree only to win minutes later the grand prize - a round-trip Cathay Pacific trip for two between Seoul and any destination in Australia or New Zealand.

Jockstrap and Rover had taken it upon themselves to verify the US 8th Army's recent report on sleazery of certain Itaewon establishments.  In the process, Jockstrap was twice called on two, unrelated occasions a "jackass" by two working women of the ville - causing him to fear he may be known as "JJ"  for "Jackass Jockstrap."  Of special investigation by our two intrepid Hashers was the report there was an establishment where a customer could find anything goes for W40,000.  Alas! it turned out to be W140,000...

EM ShiTonya brought greetings from Kimchee Marine who had been comparing ailments with Bulldog.  The two senior Hashers had agreed that many of their shared suffering could be attributed to some asshole who goes by the name of Arthur Righteous.

BaliHite apologized for the late delivery of the beer due to the traffic and then read a smart blonde joke.

It was getting about that time in the evening when the GP called upon Capt Marvel to ask him about where he felt like going.  To which CM gave the correct answer and to which the rest launched into the Way Down South anthem BUT quarter way through the song Marvel's shoe phone rang and he stepped away from the Circle without permission. For such an infraction the Circle's closure was postponed for a penalty splash accompanied by song as Marvel struggled to DownDown his extra-large panfull of beer.

It was then OnOn to Itaewon where the Pack broke out to visit Kelly's, Nana, 3 Alley's before regrouping at the MMT.