SHHH

"Cheers" Foursome

    "Mayberry RFD" Foursome

                                                      Three Hounds, Three Stogies and an Intolerable Amount of Class at the OnOut

               Co-Hare ShiTonya

      Sniffing Essence of Girl Friend

Last Week’s Notes:

At long last we were way up north since the last nth Run.  This time it was near Paju and next to one of the many necropolises.  Once again the EMs did their magic to provide clear skies, relatively warm temperatures and no winds.  In the shade there were patches of snow but still in powder-like condition.  Lovely.

Co-Hares TwinCheeks and ShiTonya initially met only three hounds - GM Plug and Play, Bendover Rover and LeperCon.  After waiting a spell, we thought no more were coming so with a blast of the Nose Horn by ShiTonya, the GM called a Circle.

Since last week's Wingee was a guest of Ammo, Rover was designated as the Stand-In Wingee.  The Co-Hares then related there were no falsies, 3 or 4 checks and two elevations to be climbed.  The  hounds were promised a "B-squared check" and a very cultural experience - as if it would not be lost on this bunch...

The GM was recovering from a particularly rough climbing of stairs from that morning's Yongsan Hash's run, Rover was still stiff from his minor traffic accident last month and LeperCon was, well, LeperCon.  So the final consensus of the three hounds was - screw it! light up three stogies and march OnOut in the direction provided by the co-hares.

The Trail:

After following the road up to an intersection, our mini-pack cut across as per the hares' directions and found the trail leading UpUp a dirt road cutting through a massive cemetery on a mountain side.  The shadows kept large patches of snow but much of the trail was now moist ground as the hounds gained elevation in the remarkably cool, clean air.

After a couple of stops to take pictures and to catch wind, the hounds reached the top and started the first decent - where, to put it bluntly, they screwed up a remarkably well marked trail.

In the finest Seoul Hash Tradition, we once again recognized that anyone can follow a good trail but it takes not one but at least two experienced Seoul Hashers to really make a mess of a straight forward exercise which, of course, is exactly our hounds did.

In all fairness, the matter was an excellent case study of adhering and ignoring some of the fundamental principles of Korean hashing where a run can be as much a vertical as a horizontal experience.  Principle #1:  "Refuse to give up elevation unless absolutely certain that it is unavoidable" was well adhered - perhaps a bit too much so. However, Principle #2: "Don't follow anyone who thinks of the trail as simply as a guideline" was clearly ignored.  The Tradition (not Principle) of the "GM is always on True Tail at all times" is certainly lovely but also potentially suicidal.

Soon after crossing an intersection at the top of the cemetery, the hounds realized that they should have taken a left instead of going straight.  But rather than lose a bit of elevation and going back on to the True Trail, they "brilliantly" chose to hoof cross cemetery to intersect where the trail would likely intersect.  Except it didn't - and the hounds found themselves threading among tombs and thickets among patches of snow.  Eventually they did intersect the True Trail and did stop at the "B² Check" to gaze out at the two stone Buddhas surrounded by trees on the opposite valley wall.  But by that time - almost two hours out, it was clearly in everyone's best interest to short cut back OnIn.

Unbeknownst to the three stogie stokers, Bones had appeared at the run site about 20 or so minutes after the mini-pack had departed.  He had a bit of trouble finding the start of the marked trail so was even further behind.  Yet having the advantage of running by himself, he was able to stay on True Trail that took him correctly over the cemetery mountain, across the the main road, along the river where we have often hashed in the past, over the bridge, through the Honeyland "Be with Cow Shit" tourist attraction, up on to a small elevation and then finally OnIn (more on that later...)

      Stand-In Wingee Rover

Map in Faint Orange True Trail, Dark Orange Actual Track 

GM Plug and Play with Stiffies in tight grasp

The Circle:  

As the original three hounds faked a run into the OnIn, they were greeted by the Hares and a hot tin of killer Taco Soup prepared by the Navy Club kitchen.  Everyone had at least two helpings - particularly when given the hint there was one other "mystery hound" still on trail and that one should eat up immediately before it was too late.  The hint was transparent - Bones was back!

But where was he?

After waiting for about 20 minutes, the Nose Horn was blown once again followed by EM ShiTonya giving the Hash Benediction.  The Hares were called up for comments by the pack on the run.  Rather than the typical comments, the pack offered explanations and alibis on how they had "run" the trail. 

Finally Bones appeared and he was declared that he was the run's Wingee since he had completed the entire course.  He related that when he got back to the Czech Republic for Christmas, he found his mother on her death bed.  As luck would have it, he had with him some Korean red ginseng.  Within a day of taking it, she made a remarkable comeback.  While not quite completely well, she is now much better and Bones is now looking around for ginseng seeds (seeds??)

The GM then advanced through the categories.  Paid-up Guests?  None.  Newly Paid-up Hashers? None.  Returning Hashers? In a sense, yes, since the GM had been away for a while.  ShiTonya offered booty from Austalia and greetings from Digital in Hong Kong.  The booty consisted of Flygun that "genuinely works without squishing = no mess."  Amazing.

Also reported at the fire was a cryptic message from Rawhide sent from some undisclosed location on the high Californian desert.  Best guess was that as as an auditor he has some kind of top secret assignment such as counting alien corpses in a Government deep freeze.

TwinCheeks was then called up and he delivered booty from his trip to Fukuoka.   He brought back to the GM a can of Premium Ebisu beer.  But not stopping with that, from his trip home to New Jersey, be picked up a batch of Stiffy pills that promised to stiffen the user in a certain part of his anatomy.  It was considered a sentimental gift to both the GM and his wife.  TwinCheeks also gave us a cross-cultural mini-session on Yiddish using a flyer from a New Jersey kosher deli.

Rover was called up and told a joke (mistake this time) and then LeperCon (actually a bit funny - this time).  He also asked for permission to leave to go to Cancun(t) with assurances he would be away just one week.

As it was now actually quite dark and since it had been quite some time since offered the honors, the GM asked EM ShiTonya which way he felt like going.  Like the experienced hasher that he is, he immediately he pointed Way Down South and the Circle one more time broke out into song.

It was then OnOn to the Mia Fiore in Itaewon with the beginning of expectations for next week's festivities at the Dead Cat Run.