SHHH

Times Are Tough!

    But There Is a Solution....

OnIn (In?!):  Ammo (left)  and OB1 (right) find their ways OnIn via two different routes [OB1 was in front of Ammo before his long-cut]

                   Co-Hare ShiTonya

"The foreigners are doing it again..."

Last Week’s Notes:

After nearly a half year, we were back to one of our favorite sites - but this time in snow.  Fortunately the EM's did their magic and kept the weather sunny and without wind so that in spite of sub-freezing temperatures, the run conditions were surprisingly good in shallow powder snow.

As Co-Hares ShiTonya and LeperCon finished their trail, Ammo, Nasty Bumpo, STBN HC and Jolly Green Knob assembled.  Taking care to come in from a different OnIn direction, the Hares were spied by Ammo right as they departed from True Trail (rats!).  Later TwinCheeks arrived and OB1 arrived. 

Ammo agreed to serve as GP as the GM was being held hostage by his wife on her birthday.  With a blast of his Hash Horn, Ammo called the Circle.  Since last week's Wingee was returning/departing Sir Lostalot, Ammo designated his son, Nasty Bumpo to serve as Stand-In Wingee.

Co-Hares ShiTonya and LeperCon were called to the front to be splashed and to give directions on the trail.  Taking into account for the snow, they had marked it in anthrax (commonly mistaken to be flour) and - oh, yes - they had thoughtfully colored it orange this time.  Also the second half of the trail was also marked in yellow chalk on trees, poles with arrows.  There were 3~4 checks and one falsie.  Finally the Hares promised a SHHH First - to be discovered on trail.   The OnOut was a new one - directly across the street and up the hill to a tomb site. With that the Pack was off... 

Twenty minutes later Rover appeared and declined to pursue the Pack as he was still recovering from a merger of his scooter with an automobile on an icy hill above Itaewon the prior week.

The Trail:

The trail cut across some bushes and then on up to a grave site.  Skirting that it was back along an overgrown trail to a the top of the hill, along some trenches and then down to 4-way trail intersection - and a check.  True trail was discovered directly opposite of the check by an exercise yard and up on to a small ridge.  Threading through the branches of a fallen tree, the Pack found itself on a good ridge trail that eventually deposited them to the edge of a military compound.  It was then hugging the fence, across another tomb site and back into the forest.  The trail then took them into a back of a hamlet and out to a road paralleling a frozen stream. 

The road took them into a center of a country town and to the second check with LeperCon's signature stogie butt in the middle of the orange circle.  The Pack picked up the trail heading north through town and up to a far ridge - and to the falsie.

EM ShiTonya performing 'Hamlet' in the snow

Hill Climb Respite for the Over-50 Hashers

Circling back a hundred meters, True Trail was discovered taking a sharp turn west and up, up a major hill.  Half way up the hill, the Pack discovered the SHHH First - a permanently secured trail-side chair - complete with a chalked "Sr Hashers' Break (wind) Check") sign.  OnOn and UpUp the trail the Pack climbed to an elaborate exercise yard at the crest of the hill to find one more check.

Assuming the trail headed down towards the north, the younger hounds bounded all the way down the hill before realizing they had not seen a trail marking.  Panting back up the hill, they looked and looked - and looked - to finally discover a LeperCon-sized yellow arrow restarting the trail down the south side of the hill.  From there it was short work following the declining ridge and out on to a major tomb site that hugged a steep hillside.  Zigzagging down among the tombs, the Pack found an asphalt trail leading by a semi-frozen pond and out on to a pave road to the the last check.

Without too much difficulty this time the hounds found the trail leading further south and then west along the same stream upstream and then over it once more going south.  It was then up along a Christmas tree farm and into the woods via animal trails and out (surprise, surprise) to another tomb site.  Skirting these last tombs, the Pack was on now on a human trail that climbed up to the ridge to a major ridgeline trail.  It was then pretty much a scamper eastwards and OnIn (coming in opposite direction of a number of previous OnOuts) - except for OB1 who was close to the front took it upon himself to misinterpret the OnIn signs and took a last-minute long-cut back to the Circle location.

                    Co-Hare LeperCon

                  Fire-Warmed Beers

   Mugging Hashers at the Mia Fiore

The Circle:  

Happily munching KFC and some excellent sandwiches picked by TwinCheeks, the Pack's first order of business was to get the fire started to heat up the beer to drinkable temperature.

LeperCon let go with an experienced blast of the Hash Horn and GP Ammo called the Circle.  Starting the with the Hash Benediction, performed by EM ShiTonya, the GP would have forgotten to toast those Hashers who had gone on before us had it not been for the rest of the Circle immediately reminding him.  ("You guys are worse than reading children their bedtime story!" groused the GP.) 

The GP then brought up the co-hares who were treated to comments by the Circle including "Somehow I got cold feet on this run!" by TwinCheeks.  Jolly Green came just short of swearing LeperCon's name in vane about that second to last check and its micro arrow.  Also a lagging hound who will remain unnamed noted that none of the earlier advancing hounds had bothered to kick out the checks!  Overall, though, it was agreed that it was a good run through some spectacularly beautiful countryside.

ShiTonya noted that while setting the trail the hares had passed three ajumoni one of whom explained to the other two that it was just the foreigners once more setting a trail - proving that we had become sort of the local culture so to speak.  When asked to name the asshole who preceded all other assholes, STBN HC (brought out by Ammo) was named as the run's Wingee - for which he learned about being splashed.

The GP then proceeded through The Categories:  Returning Hashers were just one - ShiTonya after his sojourn to Hong Kong and hanging out with Prune Gas in Australia.  He produced some literature and shared it from his travels and at the behest of the GP sang a very exquisite rendition of "I'm a Wanker!"

We had two Paid-up Guests brought out by Ammo.  First up was sonuvanammo, Nasty Bumpo, who informed us that the difference between a nun and a prostitute is that a nun has hope in her soul.  Then Ammo's house guest, STBN HC, educated us that "therein" was a 7-letter word that comprises of 10 words.  To a man, we affirmed that we didn't know that - for which both guests were appropriately splashed!

There were two Recently Paid-up Hashers.  First Jolly Green Knob came forward to sing a warped version of "Silent Night" and then Ammo admitted paying up and told a joke (or was it sung a song?)  No matter.  Both were splashed.

TwinCheeks came up to share his wit. Rover temporarily abandoned his task of keeping the beers close and warm to the fire to show off his "In & Out Sports Massage" business card he had found while out on the prowl.  He also presented the HonSec with a decent sized notepad and holder.  OB1 told a joke and soon it was time for the GP to find someone to tell us which way to go.  Since Jolly Green Knob had found the way OnIn in spite of earlier hounds not kicking out the checks (Oops!  I shouldn't have written that!) the GP guessed that Jolly Green had the best navigational skills.  And right he was as Jolly Green pointed us Way Down South - and OnOn to the Mia Fiore in Itaewon.

This week several gathered at the bar where OB1 explained that oni ("elder sister") when properly pronounced with the appropriate whine, on ya knee,  explains the origin of the word.  As EM ShiTonya so eloquently put it, "It's amazing what you can come up with when out on a piss!"

              Wingee STBN HC

  Rover's "In & Out Sports Massage" Card