Run 1607 Hash Trash

In spite of the commute, the pack arrived at the site on time but before we could circle up, we needed to maneuver the cars in anticipation of the evening. With the expertise of Fall Guy (visiting back from Phoenix) Twin Cheeks carefully merged the back of his car six inches into a jutting out tree root. As seen at the left, the dent took Twin Cheeks’ half a mind off the wax scratches on his door. Hare Rawhide was taking it easy while others looked around for a competent Cummittee Member to appear. Failing that, LeperCon was designated the PM.

Surprised and a bit flabbergasted, our Irish gnome called the circle. GM DODIC Master

was last run’s Wingee but was instead of showing up he chose to rest his lazy bastard ass on the beach in Hawaii. Since Nightcrawler was the only other hound to run the full course last week, he was designated the Stand-in Wingee. After Nightcrawler’s splashing and one for Hare Rawhide, we were told the trail would be marked with various colors of chalk, shredded secrets and open to short cuts.

Nightcrawler took the lead with Twin Cheeks and Plug-and-Play in close pursuit. BallyHite was almost late and was on their heels. Contrary to assurances to the contrary, Shitonya, too, was on trail with LeperCon there to give him moral support.

The first check suddenly bunched the pack together with various hounds searching a large grave site and various roads. Shitonya demonstrated the value of experience over speed and found the trail. Suddenly Shitonya and LeperCon were leading the pack (a first in SHHH history!)

After additional confusion at another check, the pack caught up and passed our rotund hounds, moving on out on to a fairly well marked trail.

As we passed the Hyundai Motor Technical Center and

Hynix Baseball Field, we saw what seemed to be a missed marked chalk arrow suggesting going on into the campus. With a name like Hynix, we should have guessed that there was something a-foot - but that would have taken a full mind. Instead the pack loped along for an additional couple of miles, past a couple of interesting checks, back up on to the forested ridgeline of the OnIn.

But hold on! Where were Shitonya and LeperCon? Checks were great for keeping the pack together – provided one could kick out the discovered directions. Being behind eye-sight of the pack, our two almost over-the-hill hounds were circling and howling at the last check. Shitonya eventually discovered true trail and the last two hounds rejoined the pack.

The hungry pack was well rewarded by truly killer stew personally prepared by Rawhide in the recently recovered soup tin. For this the Hare got additional points. However, he brought with him some of the smokiest firewood anyone could remember for the fire. In other words, the sum total came to zero. Being a small pack, LeperCon was confused with multiple roles as stand-in for Hon Sec, Hash Flash and now PM. In his confusion and schizophrenia, LeperCon held the circle in the smokiest location around the fire.

As we gathered around the fire, Plug and Play regaled us all with his electric, flashing necklace. Thinking him too young to be an aging hippie, we were relieved to hear he was wearing the gear in celebration of mardi gras (as pictured at left).

Since the Hash Horn was also absent, the evening started out a bit uncertain with several false attempts to emulate blowing the horn. Once again Shitonya came to the rescue with a dirty handkerchief and a nose full of mucus. Comments and critique of the trail included it being too flat but otherwise the pack begrudgingly allowed it was overall a well-done track. Rawhide then pointed out that the so-called misshaped arrow at Hynix actually indicated a short cut. For this as well as tradition he was splashed.

After some cueing from the pack, PM Lepercon asked Rawhide who was the asshole who preceded all other assholes. With little hesitation Rawhide named Nightcrawler as the back-to-back Wingee. Nightcrawler sang the only – and short – song of the evening for which he was splashed. Honorable mention went to cane-in-hand Plug and Play and count-dem-pulse-beats Twin Cheeks.

Returnee Fall Guy was recognized for showing up with a few, new jokes by being splashed. Looking around for other returnee hashers, LeperCon suddenly found himself with yet one more role. He related to having met Longthroat at the airport on his way to Singapore where he spied Virgin Air’s newest, direct competitor - Air Slut. He brought back for the GM booty from the equator – an orange erotic male sling fashioned to look like an elephant head with potentially a fully extended trunk. Surveying the pack, Lepercon chose Rawhide as the one most likely capable enough to fulfill the trunk and awarded the hare once more with the gift and a splashing.

STBN Lee appeared with his son who hovered outside of the circle for which STBN Lee was splashed. Since he couldn’t think of a joke or song, he was given a second but communal splashing. BallyHite, pointing the difficulty in telling a joke in a foreign language, was allowed to read (a good) joke for which he was splashed. He then had the nerve to accept a phone call on his cell phone. His alibi that the vibrator mode on his phone was not functioning was universally deemed to be lame enough earned him a penalty splash.

Twin Cheeks was splashed for a joke as was Shitonya for his rambling ruminations including the Koreans were showing good form this year by holding Lunar New Year on Lincoln’s Birthday – a sign of respect!

Lepercon then announced that next run number is the same as the founding date of the world’s oldest distillery – Bushmills (since 1608). Fully doubting it could be a coincidence, he proclaimed a theme run, The Black Bush Run. He also relayed the GM’s decision for the Seoul Hash to march in Hash Dress at the upcoming St. Patrick’s Day Parade as well as participate in the Charity Pub Crawl (as if any encouragement was needed for the latter!)

Fall Guy (left) was brought back to the front to be asked if he could remember which direction he would want to go. With most memory cells still well preserved (pickled?), he quickly pointed where he guessed to be as the way down south.

Fine Print: Opinions expressed herein are strictly intended for stupid entertainment and if you are offended, unread what you have read and you will be ok. Diatribes contained herein are not the official policy of any organization, individual, or deity other than the Grand Master of the Hash! The LeperCon is not responsible for his actions or mistakes herein!

Run	Date	Time	Hare	Description
1607	February 9, 2002	16:00	Raw Hide	Run 69

Last Week's Run: 69 Run